Tuesday, July 14, 2009

love means never having to clean up a dead bunny

forget flowers and chocolates and sweet nothings. here is what real love means: being late for work so you can clean up "roughly one-third" of a rabbit so your children don't find it and your wife doesn't have to deal with it.

thank you, handsome man.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

great galloping gherkins!

just picked up our weekly farm share box to discover an 18 inch cucumber.

and yes, i measured it.

wonder if vivid entertainment has considered a joint venture with an organic farm?

Monday, July 6, 2009

my apologies

to kale, for ever maligning it. now that i've figured out how to cook it, it's good. so is chard! who knew? this may be the year i finally use everything from our farm share. (except the beets. eeeww.)

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

finally

after 8 months, franken wins senate seat in minnesota.

in memoriam

Thursday, June 25, 2009

ok, now i'm really going to have nightmares

and not from reading all those vampire books - they barely register on the scary-o-meter compared to this.

Monday, June 22, 2009

land of the ends

just returned from our second day at the pool - not the free baby ones around the city, but the honest-to-god big pool you have to pay money to join.

it's in a kind of ritzy suburb right outside the city, and the clientele is an interesting mix. seems to be divided equally into:
  1. moms who look like moms (i include myself in this group)
  2. moms who look like buff-madonna armed-weight lifting-pilates freaks
  3. nannies
it's pretty easy to discern the flavor, even in cases that might initially be confusing. for example: bikini-clad lovely. is she a) smooth and firm, with no ring on her finger but at least one through her navel/nose/other body part, and a phone perpetually attached to her ear? nanny. or is she b) desperately firm but with that baggy-saggy elephant skin, a big ol' wedding ring, and an eagle eye on her precious? buff mommy.

the mommy-mommies like me wear the complete lands end catalogue of "modest" bathing suits, heavily armored confections with skirts practically down to our pudgy knees and tops that cover our swaying midriffs. the buff mommies wear the lands end bikinis that showcase their hard work and hard edges, but still have a whiff of sensible about them. and the nannies, regardless of their shape or condition, wear teensy little bits of cloth and string in lurid colors that say things like "peace" or "bad girl."

i'll bet if you put 20 of them in a police line-up and just showed me their behinds (and in some cases, it really is most of their actual behinds showing), i could tell you who's who within a minute.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

once bitten

i just read new moon, the second book in the twilight (cheesy, immensely popular teen aged vampire) series.

in one day.

it's 563 pages.

it's cheese, but it's good cheese.