a loaf of duck bread, a sippy cup, and thou

this is why i've stopped trying to make so-called nice meals for my children:

we just returned from a lovely stroll around a nearby lake, where unfortunately we didn't see any ducks to feed. i told my girls i was going to make dinner (roast chicken, mashed potatoes, carrots with brown sugar glaze), and josie responded by saying eagerly, "can we eat the duck bread?"

you mean the old, stale, frozen, thawed, nasty duck bread that has been bouncing around in the jogging stroller for the last hour?

"yes!" big smile from her.

"mmmm!" added keely.

sigh.

things my children have argued about recently

this list is in no way comprehensive:

• who is four and who is two (the two-year-old does this to push her sister's buttons);
• who gets genevieve tonight, the fictional dog in the story madeline's rescue (not a stuffed genevieve, mind you. a purely imaginary one.);
  
• who gets to go down the stairs first;
• who gets to push the buttons on the washer and dryer;
• who is bigger than a penguin (a tangent from a discussion of some memorable christmas decorations last year); and
• who likes candy more (please. mom does, you amateurs.).

everything is a toy

there is nothing funnier than watching little kids get a gift. my four-year-old just received the movie jungle book in the mail for her birthday. (mom's psyched because it was one of my favorites as a child). both girls are excited about the gift. they are excited about the ribbon, which is now being sported by a dress-up doll. they are excited about the packing envelope, which josie disemboweled to get at the bubble-wrap liner so they could stomp on it.

one of the nice things about having kids is that you get a second chance to appreciate how great bubble wrap feels between your toes. i'm off to jump.

i am not an intellectual

maybe it's because i spend my days doing brain-busting tasks like, oh, say, practically autoclaving my two-year-old's hands and trimming her nails to the point of declawing after i discover she's shoved her paw down her poopy diaper.

but even when i worked full-time in an office whipping off press releases, legislative talking points, speeches or strategic plans, my head was not filled with deep thoughts. i tend more toward people magazine or how much i weigh today or what's on sale at target.

it's not that i don't think about darfur, or global warming, or the presidential election. it's that there are SO FREAKING MANY important things to care about that i feel as though i can't possibly understand even a fraction of them. local referendums. lead in toys. iran's nuclear ambitions. breast self-exams. i feel my brain start to race and then freeze up.

so i revert to what's comforting: i can has cheezburger? is like nursery food for my cerebellum, applesauce for my synapses.

are these excuses? rationalizations? unavoidable truths in a world with far too much information for the average person to sort through on an average day? i dunno. but i do know halle berry looks fabulous pregnant.

back to me

even though i haven't had time to write (mom visiting, daughter's birthday party), just having a blog has made me notice my thoughts more, and i think it's even prompted me to have a few non-kid related thoughts, too. (unfortunately, it's done nothing for my short-term memory, so i have no idea what those thoughts were.) but maybe this will be a way for me to reclaim at least part of my brain for myself.

the circle of toes, er, life

so it's 20 years after college. i'm a 42-year-old stay-at-home mom of two kidlets, ages just 2 and almost 4. the only time i've ever been away overnight was when i was in the hospital having the second kidlet.

i agreed to a long weekend spa reunion with my college roommates, then spent the next month fantasizing ways i could get out of it (somebody coming down with the flu figured prominently in my imaginings). local pals threatened to down me with a tranq gun like a rhino and stuff me on the plane, so, deciding that was unseemly, i dragged my sorry self to detroit.

and i'm not sorry any more.

what i am is grateful to four good friends who helped reawaken the me that was dormant inside the mommy. the two decades, five graduate degrees, five husbands, eight children, and mess of career changes, states, countries, and homes that we have under our colleective belt have not diminished our ability to entertain, encourage, inspire, comfort and love each other. they were once the reason i tried vegetarianism (liked it), frat parties (hated them), and courses like problems of race that were waaaay outside my french and art history double major.

and now they are the reason i feel a surge of energy to get a mom-and-kid yoga dvd, read about our food supply, and exfoliate. and blog.

so thank you kathy, lisa helen and janet. i love you guys.