and a-one, and a-two

even a classic can stand updating some time, right? (remember how well that new coke thing went?) so here are some of the old standard songs, revised for modern mamas and their kidlets:

• what kind of fool am i...to let my kids paint in the house?
  
• don't be cruel...or you're going on time out.
  
• it's now or never...so get in that bathtub.
  
• when fools rush in...they smack their heads on the door frame.
  
• fly me to the moon...or florida.
  
• at last...mr. rogers is on.
  
• ain't misbehavin'...right this second. but wait.
  
• i enjoy being a girl...and showing everyone proof.
  
• singin' in the rain...without a coat, hat, boots or umbrella.
  
• a boy named sue...no, he just has long hair.
  
• he was really sayin' somethin'...but i couldn't hear daddy over the sound of you two fighting.
  
• she's a lady...and yes, i can see that she's fat. shhh!