waiting, waiting

i'm a-feared.

yesterday was my birthday; i turned 43. and now i'm waiting, waiting, waiting for something scary to happen to my carcass.

it's not the milestone years i fear – it's the off-brands. like 28, when i suddenly developed back fat. or 32, when my ass fell, like, 2 inches overnight. or the year i discovered that my cloven hooves are not normal and i have bunions and hammer toes (bye bye, pretty shoes). on one birthday, swear to god, a friend plucked my first gray hair from my head and waved it gleefully at me.

so now i'm waiting to see what else might bag, sag or just plain fall off.